McKay Plus Four
by dwparsnip
Summary: Rodney is reminded how lucky he is to have Jennifer in his life by someone who knows him very well. Four someones, actually.
1. Chapter 1

I don't own Stargate Atlantis or its characters…MGM does as far as I know.

Any thoughts or comments would be appreciated.

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P3N-738's orbit brought it dangerously close to its sun during a month long period in the northern hemisphere's summer. During that time the planet would be exposed to dangerous levels of radiation, causing widespread sickness. At least it had until a piece of alien technology was left on the planet that would protect it during that hazardous time.

It had worked flawlessly for thousands of years…

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"And last year was the only time it didn't work?" asked Sheppard.

He was walking along a well worn path through some light foliage towards the small building that housed the machine. His companion, a local historian named Shara, nodded in confirmation. Sheppard liked the young woman, though not for the reasons that McKay and Ronon thought he did. True she was a young, beautiful woman with striking shoulder length blond hair and a figure that many women would kill for, but he simply didn't think of her that way.

And he was damned if he knew why, though he'd have to rethink that position if the plunging neckline of her pale blue tunic plunged any lower.

"For as long as my people can remember the device worked without any problems," Shara explained as she sidestepped a tree, forcing Sheppard to hesitate and let her pass by him. "During last summer it functioned properly as well, at least until the very end of the summer."

Shara kept the lead as the path wound into a small clearing, indicating that the building they sought was very near. "When the device stopped working, we assumed it was because the danger had passed."

"But then people started getting sick," Sheppard said.

"Yes," replied Shara. "The sickness was widespread, but treatable, and only a few who were very sick beforehand died from it."

The building came into sight as they neared the far end of the small clearing. Sheppard studied the structure: though it was two stories high with a domed roof, it didn't appear to be all that big.

They walked up to the door and stepped through, immediately finding themselves in a large, beige colored room with a single mechanical device situated in the exact center of the room. The room itself appeared to be the only room in the building, taking up as much space as two of Atlantis' mess halls…maybe a little more. The machine appeared to be a control panel of some sort, with three monitor screens and two different keyboard-like areas.

They approached the machine and Sheppard said, "So the radiation was still a danger when it shut down."

"Brilliant deduction there, Sherlock Mensa," groused a new voice.

Sheppard hid a grin while Shara looked perplexed at the barb.

Rodney stood up from the chair he'd been sitting in and gave a passing glance to Shara before turning his attention to Sheppard. "It needed to work for another three or four days to completely shield the planet," he explained, "according to the sensor logs I've managed to translate. It seems as though there was an interruption in the geothermal power supply that lasted for almost a week." He motioned to the device and added, "By the time the power was back up, the radiation from the sun had passed so it shut down until the next cycle."

With a brow knit with concentration, Shara asked, "So it should function properly when the time comes again?"

McKay glanced down at the screens for verification and said, "According to this it should." He pointed to one screen. "The power levels are at maximum," he pointed to another screen, "and the shield emitters are online," and he pointed to a third screen, "and I think this one says you're good to go."

"You think?" repeated Sheppard with a frown.

"I'm pretty certain," replied the scientist. He crossed his arms over his chest and gave Sheppard a pointed glare. "It is an alien language, Sheppard, even if it is based on Ancient, and despite my massive intellect languages are not in my area of expertise."

Shara moved to stand next to McKay and looked to the screen that he had indicated. After studying the screen for a moment she looked to Sheppard. "Dr. McKay is correct."

Rodney gave Sheppard one of his patented 'I told you so' looks and sat back down in the chair. "You'll soon find out anyway." Rodney pressed one of the many buttons on the larger of the two consoles and motioned to a screen with his hand. "I think that this says the next cycle should start tomorrow or the next day."

Shara nodded in agreement, and when she did Rodney stood up and said, "Well, it's been a pleasure. You're welcome and good luck." He started walking towards the door and said, "Let's go, Colonel."

Rodney was halfway to the door before he realized that Sheppard wasn't following him. He turned around and saw that Sheppard was facing him with a small smile on his face and his hands resting on the butt end of his P-90, which was hanging on his stomach.

Rodney put his hand up. "No wait…let me guess." He lowered his hand and looked up to the ceiling. "We're going to stay and make sure everything goes smoothly," he looked down and gave Sheppard and sharp look, "because we haven't even come close to our risk-our-lives quota for this month."

Sheppard nodded and said, "Exactly right." He frowned as he realized what Rodney had actually said and added, "Well, not exactly, but yes, we're staying."

"Of course we are," mumbled Rodney with an exasperated sigh.

Shara gave Rodney a look of appreciation, and then looked to Sheppard with a wide smile. "The Elders will be very pleased."

"Of course they will be," mumbled Rodney, though not quietly enough.

Sheppard cleared his throat to get Rodney's attention and gave him 'the look' that he always gave him when he was being out of line. He then put on a polite smile as he turned to Shara. "I should head back to the gate and let my people know that we'll be staying."

"I will keep you company," Shara said as she stepped around the machine and headed towards the exit.

When she reached him John began heading towards the door, saying as he passed Rodney, "Coming, Rodney?"

Catching the look of disappointment that crossed Shara's face when John had asked him, Rodney shook his head and said, "No thanks. I'll sit here and make sure we won't be fried instead of making the hike through the woods."

Sheppard shrugged and said, "Suit yourself. Be back in a little while."

Rodney watched as Shara edged closer to Sheppard as they passed through the door and grunted in amusement. "Yeah right."

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"Have either of you seen Sheppard?" asked Rodney as he unceremoniously plopped down into the chair next to Teyla.

Ronon and Teyla had remained in the village as Rodney tried to figure out what had been wrong with the device. Teyla had insisted on sharing information with the Elders, and Ronon had remained as inconspicuous as possible, and watched. After Teyla had finished with her discussions, the Athosian and the Satedan settled at a table that had an assortment of drinks and foods upon it.

"No," replied the Ronon from the other side of the table. "We thought he was with you."

Rodney rolled his eyes. "He was," he said as he reached over and poured himself a glass of water. He took a generous sip and kept the glass near his lips as he said, "He left about an hour ago to call home." He took another sip and placed the cup on the table in front of him. "Looks like we're going to be staying a couple of days to make sure the planet doesn't get burned to a crisp."

Teyla remained diplomatically neutral in response to the news that their stay was being extended, but Ronon had little compunction in showing some disgust at the notion.

"Did you fix the thing?" Ronon asked, and when Rodney nodded he said, "Then we should go home."

"We will go home," said Sheppard as he walked up behind Ronon, "in a couple of days." The Colonel sat down next to Ronon and tapped the big man on the shoulder. "Look at it this way: we get to relax and enjoy some pleasant company," he gave McKay a raised eyebrow, "because McKay fixed the shield generator and we have nothing to worry about, right?"

McKay's shoulders dropped. "For the last time yes, the generator should work. It should have worked last time but it didn't, which, by the way, would be a prime example as to why we shouldn't be here this time."

"Easy, Rodney," drawled Sheppard as he leaned forward. He lowered his voice and said, "Shara told me about some other objects that have been around for a while that you might be interested in."

"Shara, hunh?" said Ronon with a sly grin. "That's where you've been."

Sheppard backed away a bit as though he'd been offended. "Now it wasn't like that…"

"Save it, Kirk," interrupted Rodney as he abruptly stood up. "Where are these things I'd be interested in?"

Grateful for the shot at a graceful exit, Sheppard pointed to a rundown looking building a hundred meters behind Rodney and said, "There."

Rodney snatched his cup off the table and turned to head towards the building.

"Try not to blow anything up," Sheppard called to his back.

Without missing a beat Rodney replied over his shoulder, "I'm not making any promises."

All three team members at the table stared at Rodney as he walked towards the building, and when their teammate went inside Sheppard looked to Ronon and then Teyla. "Did McKay just make a joke?"

Teyla raised a perfect eyebrow and said slowly, "I'm not certain that Rodney was joking." She gave the two men opposite her a smile and said as she stood up, "Perhaps I will go with him, in case he requires some help."

John and Ronon regarded Teyla as he went after Rodney, and when she was out of earshot Ronon leaned closer to Sheppard and said, "So what happened with Shara?"

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Rodney rubbed the back of his neck in a vain attempt to rid himself of the terrible knot that had developed there sometime overnight. It was just one of the many reasons that he hated falling asleep in a sitting position. He caught sight of the shield generator building as he turned the corner and stopped for a moment and chided himself for letting his curiosity get the better of him. Again.

He was sore, tired and, thanks to the Shara's people's predilection for distasteful breakfast dishes, starving. He sighed and restarted his trek, walking through the building's door a moment later to find everything just as he'd left it the day before.

Rodney collapsed into the chair and sighed. "I'm getting too old for this," he complained out loud. He allowed himself a small smile at the thought of Sheppard jumping all over that comment and adding to it, then he shook his head and focused on the screens before him.

He hadn't mastered the language by any means, but it was a derivative of Ancient so he wasn't totally clueless, and that was why a certain set of symbols caught his attention right away.

Rodney leaned forward and peered at the information. As far as he could tell, the shield was moments from activating, which in itself wasn't unexpected, but what did come as a surprise was the appearance of the Ancient-like symbols for 'dimension'.

"What the hell?" Rodney asked as he pressed several keys.

New information sprung forth on the screen, and Rodney tried his best to read it, but ultimately he realized that if he wanted to know with absolute certainty what was going on, he would need help.

With another sigh he leaned back in the chair and tapped his earpiece. "McKay to Sheppard."

He waited and was rewarded a moment later with Sheppard's sleepy voice filtering through the miniature speaker in his ear. 'Go ahead, Rodney.'

"Good morning, Colonel," said Rodney with much more enthusiasm than he really felt. "Sorry to wake you up but I need some help."

There was a groan over the line followed by, 'Give me a few minutes, Rodney.'

"Not your help, Colonel," replied Rodney. "Shara's."

Rodney could almost hear John snapping wide awake at his insinuation, and when the Colonel's voice reached him again he could tell that Sheppard was now wide awake and in damage control mode. 'I'll…ah, I'll get ready and go get her for you.'

Rodney rolled his eyes and leaned forward against the console. "Spare me the sweet and innocent routine, Sheppard," Rodney replied impatiently. "Just reach over and poke her, or shake her, or do whatever you have to do to wake her up and tell her to come up to the shield generator building. I need help with some translating."

Rodney smiled smugly when he heard John clear his throat and then say, 'She'll be right there. Sheppard out.'

Rodney humphed and shook his head as he said, "It's just too easy sometimes."

Rodney checked the screens again and his brow creased when he saw that the power levels had spiked. "What is that?"

Before he had a chance to study the data flowing across the screen the building began to shake, and even as he jumped up and turned to run for the door he could see a field of blue energy rise from the floor and crawl up the wall. He spun around and saw the same thing happening to each wall and looked up just in time to see the bluish walls converge at the apex of the dome ceiling.

He clamped down on the fear that threatened to swallow him and tapped his comm. "McKay to Sheppard!" He waited for a response and then tried again. "McKay to Sheppard!"

After a moment of silence in his ear he tried, "McKay to Teyla!"

Nothing.

"McKay to Ronon!"

Nothing.

"Crap!"

As suddenly as it had started, the shaking stopped, leaving the building eerily quiet. Rodney moved quickly to the console and looked for the power levels, and sighed in relief when they remained steady.

He stiffened when he heard footfalls on the hard floor in front of him, and after taking a breath he looked up and exclaimed, "It's about time you…got…here…"

Rodney stopped talking and took in the sight before him. An odd feeling developed in the pit of his stomach even as it dawned on him what was happening.

Rodney sighed again and looked one by one into four sets of eerily familiar blue eyes.

He watched as the newcomers regarded him and then each other. When all eyes settled on him again the only sound that could be heard in the room was a perfectly synchronized "Ah, crap!" as muttered by five Meredith Rodney McKays.

Rodney closed his eyes for a second and hoped that when he opened them he'd be all alone, but when his eyelids lifted he still saw four too many Rodneys.

"Just great," he said as he studied the McKays before him.

The one farthest to his left wore a black uniform similar to the uniform he was wearing, with identical tac vest and a standard issue nine millimeter strapped to his right hip. In fact, except for the pronounced scar on his right cheek, that McKay was identical to him from head to toe.

The second McKay was not. While he wore the same standard issue black uniform complete with sidearm, that McKay wasn't wearing a tac vest and wore an accessory that Rodney never would: a mustache that Burt Reynolds would have been proud of.

The third McKay wore a set of standard green-brown combat fatigues, nine millimeter weapons on each hip and a life signs detector clipped to his belt. What set that McKay apart from him and the others, besides his wardrobe and twin weapons, were the lines on the man's face- he'd seen hard times.

McKay Number Four was wearing the standard beige and blue uniform that he'd worn the first year on Atlantis, as well as a pair of glasses that looked eerily similar to the ones Zelenka wore. Unlike McKay Number Three, this one had no worry lines at all.

Rodney shook his head and turned back to the console. Reams of data scrolled across the screens, data Rodney couldn't totally understand. He turned back to the McKays and said, "I don't suppose either of you knows how to read this stuff?"

McKay Number Two walked over to stand next to Rodney and looked at the screen. "It's power distribution numbers to the various shield emitters situated around the planet," he said. "The solar shield is up and holding." He touched a button and a different set of symbols began running down the screen. He sighed and said, "We're trapped by some sort of force field that's…oh."

"'Oh'?" repeated McKay Number One as he rushed over. "What do you mean 'oh'?"

"The geo thermal energy isn't the power source for the shield generator," replied Number Two with some surprise in his voice.

Rodney thought about it for a second and he snapped his fingers as he said, "The geo thermal energy is used to boot up another power source, a bigger one, like a dimensional power generator that in turn powers the shield generator!"

"And that would explain why we're all here at the same time," added McKay Number Four.

"And because of the force field surrounding this room," submitted McKay Number Three as he joined the rest of them, "the dimensional properties of the dimensional generator are confined to this room."

Rodney nodded. "We must have all been in this room in our own dimensions at the same time when the machine powered up."

"So how long is this going to last?" asked Number Four.

Everyone looked to Number Two, who rolled his eyes and pressed another couple of buttons on the console. "The computer estimates that the solar radiation will be at harmful levels for twenty-seven days."

Rodney moved and looked over Number Two's shoulder at the screen. "But look at that," he said as he reached around Number Two's shoulder and pointed at the screen. "That looks like a time lapsed indicator."

"It is," replied Number Two.

"But look at it," said Rodney. "It's going down way too fast and will be gone long before twenty-seven days are up."

Number Two pushed another button and read the new set of symbols that came on the screen. "The constant merging of dimensions is affecting time within this room."

Rodney studied the screen again. "Time is going faster outside than it is in here."

"Yes," replied Number Two. "Much faster. If this remains constant, we only have to wait an hour. Maybe less, though almost a month will have passed by outside."

There were groans of disgust and protest from the five of them, the idea of losing nearly a month more than a little irritating.

"What if we manipulate the power flow?" suggested Number One. "It would…"

"There's nothing we can do about it," interrupted Rodney, already one step ahead of his scarred twin. "We can't tinker with the power flow…we could disrupt the shield and irradiate everyone, ourselves included. Even a flicker in the shield and we're all screwed." He sighed and gave everyone a look of profound annoyance. "We're stuck."

"Well that's just great!" exclaimed Number Three. "The Wraith are running roughshod over the galaxy and I'm going to be stuck in here for a month!"

"It looks that way," said Rodney. He turned to perplexed look at his dimensional counterpart. "The Wraith are what?"

A look of anger flashed in Number Three's eyes. He turned away from the others and sat down on the floor at the base of the console and leaned back against it. "The Wraith are all over the place. We're fighting them with everything we've got, but we're losing." He sighed and closed his eyes. "Atlantis has been pretty much crippled. The shield has been permanently disabled, we've exhausted all our drones and the ZedPM is almost depleted." He opened his eyes and motioned around the room. "That's why we came here, looking for power sources and weapons."

"Too bad," said Number One as he sat down next to Number Three. "The Wraith are all but gone in my dimension," he said, oblivious to the looks of disbelief from the others. "Our problem is the Replicators. Every time we think we've come up with something to destroy them, they adapt and find a way to survive."

"How did you, ah…" Rodney didn't finish, pointing instead to his own cheek to ask how he'd received the scar.

"A replicator called Oberoth wasn't particularly impressed with a virus we were trying to introduce into them," replied Number One with a morbid smile, "so he turned his right arm into a sword and took a swing at me. Sheppard tackled him and he only got in a glancing blow."

Rodney nodded and turned to Number Two. "What about you?"

Number Two shrugged. "The Wraith are a problem, but we're holding our own. Same goes for the Replicators. My Atlantis has three fully powered ZedPMs."

Everyone turned disbelieving looks at him and he explained excitedly, "They were there when we got there!"

"Lucky bastard," grunted Number Three, and Rodney, Number One and Number Four nodded in agreement.

"What about you?" asked Rodney to Number Four.

Everyone turned to Number Four who glanced around and said, "We haven't been on Atlantis that long. The Wraith are trouble, but I don't know what Replicators are, unless you're talking about the Replicators that SG-1 had dealings with. Other than that, we're exploring the city and the galaxy and trying to figure out what everything does."

Rodney nodded and remembered what it had been like when they had first gotten to Atlantis. Exploration and finding ZedPMs had been the first orders of business. He was still thinking about it when Number Two tapped him on the shoulder.

"What about you?" asked Number Two when Rodney looked at him.

Rodney shrugged. "Atlantis is fine in my dimension. We have a couple of ZedPMs, but they're not at full power. We've managed to keep one step ahead of the Wraith, for the most part, and we've defeated the Replicators. We met some rogue Asgard a while back that we haven't heard from since then, but we don't expect it to stay that way."

Rodney leaned forward and braced himself against the console. He was watching the time lapsed indicator when something caught his eye, a flash of light near Number Two's hand. Rodney glanced down and his eyes bulged open when he saw what looked like…

He stood up straight and pointed at Number Two's hand. "You're married!?!?!?"

Number Two straightened up and gave Rodney a bewildered look. "That's what a wedding band on the left ring finger usually indicates, isn't it?"

Rodney stared at his mustachioed doppelganger. "Ha, ha," he said with blatant sarcasm. "Who?"

Number Two actually smiled as he fondly said her name. "Katie."

Rodney's mouth fell open in shock at the affection in Number Two's voice, and out of the corner of his eye he saw Number Four's face go from confusion, to realization and then to awe in the span of eight seconds.

"Katie?" Number One repeated with a smile. "I asked her to marry me once, but I lost my nerve." His smile turned sad. "She left Atlantis not long after that."

"Katie Brown?" asked Number Four as he took a quick step towards them. "I…we never…" He trailed off and shook his head in disbelief. "I haven't even…wow."

"My Katie died in a Wraith attack before I got the chance to ask her," said Number Three softly. "I had the ring in my pocket for weeks looking for the right time, but it never came."

Rodney was still trying to digest the shocking news when Number Three added, "I miss her, but I don't know how I would have gotten through some of the crap I've gone through without Laura."

"Laura?" asked Rodney. His eyes opened wide as a most unnaturally bizarre thought occurred to him. "As in **Cadman**? As in tap dancing, explosive expert Laura Cadman? Are you insane!"

Number Two whistled in appreciation while Number One gave Number Three a look that was an odd mixture of admiration and repugnance. Rodney was leaning more towards the second one. It wasn't that he hated Cadman, but she simply unnerved him with the simplest look and that was, well, unnerving.

"We've been through a lot together," explained Number Three with a shrug. "She knows me better than I know myself, which is very useful most of the time."

"Cadman!" mumbled Rodney, forcing the image of the strawberry blond Marine that always took great delight in torturing him any way she could from his mind. "How about you?" Rodney asked Number One as the latter shook his head and leaned back against the console.

Number One shot Rodney a scathing look before looking straight ahead at the shimmering blue force field. He was silent for a few moments before saying, "I'm not seeing anyone, and I don't intend to." He stopped and cleared his throat and then sighed. "I had feelings for, I mean, I was interested in Jennifer, but she was interested in someone else."

"Ronon," guessed Rodney, earning him a nod from Number One, and a look of bewilderment from Number Four who obviously had no idea who Jennifer and Ronon were.

"They got married and have a son," stated Number One in a neutral voice, but it wavered as he added, "They've been having some trouble lately, but I'm keeping out of it." He cleared his throat again and the Rodney McKay patented arrogance filled his voice as he said, "I've got far more important things to do than worry about their love life."

The room fell silent, and once again Number Two tapped Rodney on the shoulder. "I take it by the surprise on your face when you noticed my ring that you're not married."

Rodney shook his head and shifted uncomfortably on his feet. Now that his mind wasn't locked exclusively on the task of figuring out what the hell was happening, thoughts of Jennifer roared to the surface. "No. I asked Katie, but it didn't work out." He gave Number One a quick look before saying, "Right now I'm…" Rodney hesitated and shook his head. Why torment that McKay with the knowledge that he and Jennifer were together and in love? "You know what?" he said in a rush. "We'd be better off exchanging information that can help us when we get back to our own dimensions." He pointed to Number Three. "You! Go to a planet called…" A beeping noise began emanating from the panel causing Rodney to abandon his thought and demand, "What now!?!"

Number Four advanced towards the console as Number One and Number Three jumped up from the floor and turned to look at the screens.

Number Two studied the monitor and said, "The dimensional generator is beginning to power down, which means the dimensional merging is failing." He looked up and added, "We're almost out of time."

Rodney's left hand shot out and grabbed Number Three's arm. "Go to…"

Before he knew it, Rodney was thrown to the floor by what felt like an earthquake. The shaking continued as he reached over and grabbed onto the console, holding onto it for dear life as the floor continued rocking every which way. He looked around for the other McKays, but they were nowhere to be found.

He cursed and noticed that the blue energy field that had trapped him and the others in the room had disappeared.

A moment later the shaking simply stopped.

Rodney kept a hold of the console and pulled himself upright. After making sure he was all right he looked down to the screens. Everything appeared normal, with all the displays and indicators having gone back to the way they were when he first saw them the day before.

Or was it twenty-eight days ago?

"Rodney!"

Rodney's head snapped to the doorway and his shoulders sagged in relief when he saw Sheppard, Teyla and Ronon rushing towards him.

Teyla reached him first and put her hands on his shoulders, her eyes boring intently into his. "Are you okay, Rodney?"

Rodney nodded and managed to give her a small smile. "I'm fine."

"What the hell happened?" asked Sheppard. "I was on my way up here after you called and…"

"And the shield activated," said Rodney as Teyla gave his arms an affectionate squeeze and then released him.

"That was a month ago, Rodney!" exclaimed Sheppard.

Rodney sighed and nodded. "Actually Sheppard, it was twenty-seven days ago."

"Rodney," warned Sheppard. "Zelenka has been working himself into an early grave trying to figure out what the hell was happening in here! We couldn't even get any scanner readings inside the building, though he kept mumbling something about power. And then Shara said that her people never came near the place when the shield was up because of some…"

Rodney held up his hand and said, "Look, the geo thermal thing was meant the give a power boost to a dimensional generator, which is what actually powers the shield. To protect the planet from a whole bunch of things that I'm in no mood to explain, a force field encompasses the room."

"That's what kept us from coming in or contacting you?" asked Ronon.

"Yes," replied Rodney. "And even though it's been twenty-seven days for you guys, it's only been an hour for me…or a little less." He looked around and asked, "I assume the shield worked then?"

"It worked perfectly, Rodney," said Teyla. She reached over and placed her left hand on his arm and began to gently pull him towards the door. "Come. There is someone outside waiting to see you."

Rodney was too tired to object and allowed Teyla to lead him outside. When he stepped through the door, the bright light of the morning sun shone directly into his eyes, forcing them closed. Yet even as his vision blackened his ears picked up a sound that sounded oddly like…clapping?

Rodney eased his eyes open, and once they adjusted to the light he saw a sight that humbled even him. Dozens of Atlantis personnel and P3N-738 natives were standing around in the clearing- surrounded by portable lighting gear, generators and temporary workstations- applauding and smiling.

His mouth dropped open as his eyes scanned the many happy faces before him. Finally Radek walked up to him and clapped him heartily on the shoulder.

"Welcome back, Rodney," the Czech said with a wide smile.

Rodney nodded and said, "Thank you, Radek." Rodney motioned to the building behind him and added, "For trying, and whatnot."

"It was no trouble," replied Zelenka with a nod.

Rodney peered around Radek and scanned the crowd again, but frowned when the one person he wanted to see above all others was nowhere to be seen.

Radek leaned in towards Rodney and said in a low voice, "She's behind you, Rodney."

Rodney turned around so fast that he automatically reached out and grabbed onto Radek's arm for support.

Just as Radek had said, Jennifer was there, standing in front of his teammates and watching him with concerned eyes. He remained still as her eyes, those beautiful brown orbs that, no matter how much of an ass he was being, always looked at him with love, studiously examined him for outward signs of trauma or injuries.

First and foremost she was a doctor, a caring doctor whose first priority in any situation would be her patient's safety and wellbeing and, whether he liked it or not, right at that moment he was her patient until she was satisfied that he was uninjured.

It wasn't until her eyes met his and a small smile formed on her beautiful lips that he began to move towards her.

No words were spoken as he approached her, no voicing of concern or words of greeting, and when Rodney finally reached Jennifer he wrapped his arms around her shoulders and hugged her to him.

As Jennifer's arms closed around his waist, Rodney noticed Sheppard motion to everyone to leave them alone. Ronon and Teyla walked past him with small smiles on their faces and Rodney managed to catch Sheppard's eye and give him an appreciative nod as his friend walked by.

John returned the look with a smile and said softly, "We'll wait by the gate," before moving on.

It wasn't until all the retreating footfalls had faded away that he felt the first shudder from Jennifer's body. There was once a time when would have pulled away and run for the hills, but now his first instinct, and the correct one apparently, was to tighten his embrace and as soon as he did the floodgates opened up.

Jennifer began shaking in his arms, her hands clutching at the jacket covering his back as sob after sob tore from her mouth into his chest. Rodney closed his eyes and held onto Jennifer as she released twenty-seven days worth of fear and worry, and cursed himself for getting into a situation where he caused her such grief.

It took several minutes for her sobbing to ebb away, and when she stopped completely she softly said, "I thought I'd lost you."

Rodney rested his chin on the top of her head and said, "Not a chance."

Jennifer cuddled into him and he thought about the other McKays: Number Four, the McKay that had yet to see the dangers and experience the evils of Pegasus that he'd dealt with and was all about the work; Number Two, the man who married Katie and seemed to be more than happy with that choice, though history had proven that Rodney and Katie were not meant to be in this reality; Number Three, the man who had seen terrible things in Pegasus, and had found comfort in a woman that in his reality didn't creep him out whenever he saw her; and Number One, the one most like him, the one who found love in Jennifer Keller but lost it to another man and threw himself into his work to hide from the pain.

He was none of those men; he couldn't see himself with Katie or Cadman, nor could he go back to being totally alone as he used to be. The reason for that was the family he'd found on Atlantis, and the biggest part of that family was the beautiful woman he was holding. He was simply a better man with her in his life.

He heard a sniffle from Jennifer and looked down as she leaned back to look at him.

"I've missed you," she said with a quiver in her voice and eyes red from crying. "We weren't sure what had happened to you or what was happening inside the building."

Rodney gave her a small smile, and then leaned down and pressed his lips to hers. Even though to him it had only been a couple of days since he'd kissed her, it felt as though it had been the first time in a very long time.

He stopped the kiss and looked at her questioningly. "I love you. You know that right?"

Jennifer smiled, though her brow creased in question. "Of course I do." Her right hand released his jacket and snaked its way up to his cheek. "What happened in there?"

Rodney sighed as her hand cupped his cheek and said, "Later." He kissed her again and then said, "I want to take you home."

Jennifer released him and smiled when he took her hand in his and began leading her along the path towards the gate.

"You sure you want to wait to tell me what happened?" she asked as they quickly moved along the path.

"Yeap," replied Rodney.

He stopped and gave her a kiss which surprised her both in its suddenness and its intensity. She was still recovering from it when he started again along the path.

Jennifer stopped and gently pulled on Rodney's arm to get him to stop as well. When he turned to look at her she asked, "Did you have some sort of epiphany or something?"

"No, not exactly." Rodney glanced back along the path towards the building and then looked into her eyes. "Let's just say that I've been reminded of just how fortunate I am that you're in my life." He edged closer to her so that he could hold both her hands. "And now I want to go home so I can remind you how much you mean to me," he said quietly, though there was an underlying current of confidence in his voice as well.

Jennifer's eyes narrowed in confusion. "Remind me how much I mean…" She stopped and a rosy tint settled into her cheeks as she caught onto his not so subtle intimation. "Oh."

Rodney swallowed the lump that suddenly appeared in his throat and said, "If you're feeling…"

He stopped talking when Jennifer squeezed his hands and motioned down the path with a nod of her head.

"Let's go home," Jennifer whispered huskily, leaving absolutely no doubt that she understood exactly what he meant, and that she had no objections at all.

Rodney nodded and said as they started walking again, "Yes, let's go home."


	2. The McKays' Returns

I still don't own Stargate Atlantis, and I've finally come to grips with the fact that I never will.

There will be one more chapter most likely.

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Number Four

McKay walked through the door and came face to face with Ford, which nearly scared the crap out of him.

"Damn it, Ford!" he all but yelled at the younger man. "Are you trying to give me a heart attack!"

Ford didn't respond to the heated barb. Instead the soldier lifted his hand up to his ear and tapped his comm. unit. "Ford to Major Sheppard." A brief pause. "He's back, sir." Another pause. "Yes, sir." Ford looked to McKay and said, "The Major says to head back to the village."

He turned and began walking down the path without waiting, forcing Rodney to run to catch up to him. They walked in silence until McKay could no longer take it.

"Aren't you curious?" he said to Ford.

The younger man kept his eyes forward as he said, "Not really."

McKay shook his head. "You're not the least bit interested in the fact that I was in a different dimension for twenty-seven days, where I met four other Rodney McKays?"

Ford shook his head. "A place where there were five of you? Definitely not interested."

McKay sighed in exasperation. "It figures a gun toting grunt wouldn't appreciate the scientific accomplishment…"

"Appreciate or care about it, McKay," interrupted Ford as the village came into sight.

McKay opened his mouth to insult the lieutenant's genealogical lineage when a group of Atlantis personnel doing some work on the edge of the village caught his eye, specifically a petite woman struggling to carry two gym bags in her arms.

Before he even knew what he was doing, McKay was jogging towards the woman. When he reached her he grabbed one of the bags and said, "Allow me."

The woman looked at him, her eyes wide and mouth slightly agape in complete and utter shock. After a moment she shook herself out of it and managed to shyly say, "Thank you."

Rodney became lost in her bright blue eyes for moment. "I…it's no trouble…I, that is we," he corrected with a wave at Ford who had walked up beside him, "are heading into the village anyway." McKay passed the bag over to Ford, ignoring the soldier's hard look and took the other bag out of the woman's hand.

"I'm Rodney," he said as his eyes found hers again. "Rodney McKay."

The woman smiled bashfully at him. "I know who you are," she said softly. She held out her hand and said, "My name is Katie Brown."

"I know who you are," replied Rodney as he took her hand in his and gently shook it. "I know."

-------------------------------------------------

Number Three

McKay looked about the room when it stopped shaking and saw what he'd wanted to see: he was alone.

He didn't bother to check the monitors- he trusted himself, or more to the point his dimensional counterparts, to know whether or not the shield had worked.

After a moment he reached down and took the life signs detector from his belt and studied the screen. There was one life form waiting outside the building, a human life form.

McKay smiled and started walking towards the door. It could only be one person.

He stepped through the door and spared a glance at the ruins of a once great forest before looking towards the dreary sky.

"Took you long enough, McKay," said a voice that was as irritated as it was amused. He looked down and saw Laura standing next to a camouflaged tent that had been setup next to a large boulder, her eyes trained on him, making sure that he was indeed Rodney McKay. "Where the hell have you been for a month?"

McKay gave Cadman a smirk as he walked towards her. She looked the same as she did when he'd stepped inside the building an hour ago, even though twenty-seven days had passed for her. Her piercing hazel eyes stayed on him as he approached her, ever vigilant lest the Genii try to replace him again. He still missed her long hair, even if her current hairstyle reminded him of Sam's hairstyle, and he could almost still feel the punch to the ribs she'd given him a year ago when he told her he didn't really like it. Her standard issue fatigues hugged her curves as they usually did, and his smirk became more pronounced as her hand slowly edged toward the P-90 hanging at her hip.

Her hand had reached the weapon and her slender index finger had curled around the trigger by the time he'd reached her.

He looked into her eyes and said the one thing that would convince her that he was indeed her Rodney McKay. "I still don't like your hair."

Cadman relaxed and released her weapon. "Bite me, McKay," she responded, though her wide smile easily negated the scorn in her voice.

McKay reached over and pulled her to him. "I'd rather kiss you," he said as his lips descended upon hers.

They kissed for a long time, until her curiosity became too much of a nag to ignore any longer. She stopped their kiss and found his eyes. "What happened?"

"Nothing important," he replied as he looked around.

"There's no one else around," she said, knowing what he was looking for. "The others returned to Atlantis two weeks ago."

"They gave up," he surmised, and when she didn't contradict him he added, "But you didn't."

Cadman shook her head. "Never."

"And that's why I love you," he said as he once again leaned over to kiss her.

-------------------------------------------------

Number Two

McKay looked up and found that he was still in the shield generator room, and that he was alone.

He sighed and reached up to open his comm. line. "McKay to Carter."

'Rodney!' Sam's voice yelled in his ear, making him grimace. 'Are you all right?'

"I'm fine," he replied as he started walking towards the door. "The energy field that has been around the room just disappeared." He stopped as he passed through the door and the sun hit his face.

He heard the soft whine of a Jumper and looked up to see one approaching from the village.

'We see you,' Sam's voice said in his ear. 'We'll be there in a minute.'

"I'll be waiting," he said as he lifted his hand up to shield his eyes from the sun. The Jumper made a wide circle and came in for a landing in the middle of the clearing. The pilot swung the ship around just before it touched down so that the rear hatch was facing him.

McKay began walking towards the Jumper as the hatch started to lower and the most welcomed noise greeted his ears.

"Daddy!"

McKay smiled as his son jumped from the Jumper and started running towards him. For a moment he was concerned that the four year old was running so fast that he would trip and fall, but then he remembered that the little boy had managed to avoid his father's klutz gene.

He grabbed the boy up in his arms and hugged him tightly when he reached him, and as the boy hugged him back McKay looked to the Jumper and saw his wife and team leader watch him and his son with smiles on their faces.

McKay headed to the Jumper as his son clung to him, and when he reached the Jumper he stepped into the craft and kissed Katie as best he could with a four year old in his arms.

"I've missed you," she said as she rubbed their son's back.

"I've missed you too," he replied sincerely. He turned to his team leader. "I assume you figured out what was happening?"

Sam nodded and motioned to the building. "Once I realized the energy we were detecting was a force field, it all fell together pretty quickly." She raised her eyebrows as she asked, "Is there anything we need to know before we leave?"

McKay turned to regard the structure for a moment, then turned to look at his wife as he said, "No there isn't. Let's go home."

-------------------------------------------------

Number One

McKay had only barely registered that the room had stopped spinning before Sheppard was inside telling him to hurry up.

He ran to the door and looked up to see a dozen Jumpers buzzing around in the bright sky. He looked down to the clearing and saw that Sheppard was running towards another Jumper waiting in the clearing and he immediately followed suit.

Sheppard had the hatch already lifting as McKay approached the Jumper, forcing the scientist to dive aboard the ship and land with a thump big enough to knock the wind out of him.

"Let's go!" he heard Sheppard roar.

McKay was still trying to catch his breath when he felt Sheppard's hands grab his shoulders and roughly haul him up to sit on the bench.

Sheppard sat next to him and gave him a smirk. "Nice of you to join us, McKay."

McKay nodded and managed to ask, "What's…going…on?"

Sheppard's smirk disappeared and his mouth became set in a firm line. "The shield worked," he said after a moment, "but the Replicators showed up a little while ago. We've evacuated those that we could, but we're out of time."

Rodney leaned forward and looked out the front window. The gate came into view and was already active. Four seconds later, McKay felt the familiar sensation of travelling through a wormhole.

It took more time than usual to disembark from the Jumper due to the number of Jumpers that returned ahead of them full of refugees, time that McKay used to tell Sheppard about his experience. He'd just finished his tale by the time they were allowed to leave.

"That's incredible," said Sheppard as they exited the Jumper together. "Five McKays in one room and the universe survived."

"Oh hardy har-har," Rodney griped sarcastically. "How did the Replicators find us this time, or do we know?"

Sheppard shrugged as he turned the corner ahead of McKay. "We have no idea."

McKay thought about that as they walked until he looked up and found himself in front of the Infirmary. He glared at Sheppard and said as he turned to leave, "I'm fine."

Sheppard caught McKay's arm and turned the scientist towards him. "You've been gone for almost a month, Rodney. It's procedure. You know that."

McKay was about to argue, but Sheppard's discreet glance behind him made him pause. He turned around and finally noticed the three burly Marines behind him carrying standard and anti-Replicator weapons.

McKay sighed and entered the Infirmary without any argument. He could see the need for caution; he just hated the idea of going into **her** domain.

"Rodney?"

Speaking of **her**.

McKay looked over and saw Jennifer pointing to the bed next to her. "Have a seat."

He did as she said, hoping that if he kept his mouth shut and complied willingly he could get the hell out of there. He never even complained or flinched when she took his blood.

He remained still as Jennifer ran a scanner over him and waited silently as she read the results of the scan. He could see a small smile come to her lips as she relaxed.

"It's good to see you, Rodney," she said as she placed the scanner on the bed next to him.

"Thanks," McKay said curtly as he stood up. The three Marines immediately stepped in front of him to block his escape.

"It's okay," Jennifer quickly announced. "He is Dr. McKay."

Rodney nodded to Jennifer and took a step towards the door, but stopped when he felt her small hand grab his arm in a grip that was as strong as any woman's.

"Welcome home, Rodney," she said softly. She hesitated for a second before adding, "I…we've missed you."

McKay looked down to where she was touching him and felt his stomach lurch when he saw the light reflect off her wedding ring. He reached over with his free hand and removed her hand from his arm, and then walked away as he said, "I have work to do."

He didn't hesitate as he walked through the Infirmary door, nor did he look back to see the single tear slide down Jennifer's cheek.


	3. Number One

Hey there. Here's a little addition to this fic. Don't really know where it came from, but it seems to be something I had to get out of my system. And now it is I hope. Bit of a purge fic I guess. I can read the angsty stuff, even like some, but don't know about writing it. To be honest…I really don't like it. Any feedback is appreciated.

Everyone will probably read ooc…it's an alternate reality right?

DaniWilder explicitly told me (in fact she warned me) to put a warning here: it's not a happy ending to this one. You've been warned.

MGM owns SGA.

* * *

Number One.

Rodney breathed a light sigh into the empty lab, a slight noise that would have sounded sad to anyone who would have heard it. Not that there was anyone around at three in the morning. Not that the time mattered much these days. His staff had been extraordinarily efficient in avoiding him in the four days since he returned from P3N-738, since what Sheppard called the Multiple McKay Extravaganza. Even Sheppard and Ellis, his two closest friends, had maintained minimal contact with him.

He knew he'd been in a sour mood since that day; he just couldn't bring himself to give a damn about it. The information he'd received about Rodney McKay's life in other realities reminded him of just how wrong it had all gone for him.

He sighed again and let his mind drift back to the events of four days ago. After leaving the Infirmary- and Jennifer- he'd gone in search of Sheppard. He'd found the Colonel in his office, and after the door had closed he'd tore a strip off his former team leader for making him go off world in the first place after practically retiring from off world missions to concentrate on work in the lab. He'd left Sheppard with a direct and dire threat that he guaranteed would come to fruition if he ever mentioned him going off world again.

All he wanted was to work in his lab, away from Replicators, teammates and…her. Contact with Jennifer and the rest was impossible to entirely avoid on Atlantis, of course, though he'd done a damn fine job of it for years. But by staying in the lab as much as possible, he was able to make the rules. Off world Sheppard and the others knew more, despite his intellect and extensive training in weapons and military tactics. He simply didn't have the instinct for it.

Then of course, there was Jennifer. Going off world meant a mandatory scans and blood work immediately upon return to Atlantis, and more often than not Jennifer was on duty and responsible for administering those tests. His hand absently moved up to his right cheek. And then there was the possibility of injuries which, as the CMO and most capable surgeon in the city, she treated.

Rodney swiftly lowered his hand onto his desk as he heard someone enter the room. He looked up and watched Sheppard walk casually towards him, a bottle in one hand and two glasses in the other.

When he got to the desk, Sheppard looked down and gave Rodney a half smile. Rodney nodded once and John placed one glass in front of Rodney and the other in front of him. He cracked the seal on the bottle of Scotch and poured Rodney a generous helping before doing the same for himself and sitting down.

Despite his anger and foul mood, Rodney couldn't help but feel some comforted in the familiar event. He'd lost track of how many times he and Sheppard shared a bottle of Scotch after trying times, and God knew there'd been far too many of those. He had no idea where the Colonel kept getting the bottles, but he was glad that he did.

Sheppard picked up his glass and held it out in a salute. "To the Replicators," he said with mock admiration, "May they one day rest in pieces."

Rodney lifted his glass and tapped it against Sheppard's, then brought it to his mouth and drained his glass in three gulps. The liquid burned beautifully as it went down his throat, and he placed his glass on the table. Sheppard filled it again and gave him a scrutinizing look.

"Look, Rodney," he said hesitantly, "I'm sorry about…"

"Forget it," replied Rodney quietly, and he meant it.

Sheppard accepted that. "Want to talk about it?"

"Not really," replied Rodney, though his voice betrayed him and suggested otherwise.

Sheppard smirked and Rodney knew he was done for. He picked up the glass and cradled it in his hands as he leaned back in his chair, debating on whether or not to fill in all the details he'd left out of his report.

He sighed for the third time in ten minutes and took a sip of his drink. "The other McKays," he started, "were different."

John took a drink from his glass and shrugged. "Different realities, different lives, I guess. What about them got you so worked up?"

Rodney shifted uncomfortably in his seat, trying to figure out how to avoid answering the question.

"Keller, huh?" observed Sheppard, and he only smiled when Rodney glared at him in shock. "She's the only subject that gets you this cranky."

Rodney nodded, conceding the point. He gently twirled the glass in his hand and watched the golden liquid inside lazily slosh around the smooth surface of the glass. "One of them, he didn't talk much about himself, though he asked a lot of questions about the rest of us."

"Which one is this?" asked John, referring to the labels Rodney had given the.

"Beta," he replied.

John thought for a second and pulled the information from his memory. "The McKay who was dressed the same as you, and except for your cheek you were identical."

Rodney confirmed that with a nod. "He noticed that Delta was married, then asked us about our lives but…"

"But what?" asked Sheppard after a moment.

Rodney gulped down the rest of his drink, hoping the amber liquid would push down the clog in his throat. He took a deep breath and let it out. "I mentioned that I, well, I said I had feelings for Jennifer but she was interested in someone else." Rodney looked at Sheppard and tried to hold in the grimace when he said, "He knew it was Ronon, almost as though the same had happened to him."

Sheppard's brow rose. "But?"

Rodney shook his head, unsure if he really saw what he was about to tell Sheppard or not. "But he wasn't upset or hurt by it."

Sheppard contemplated that and gave Rodney a shrug. "Maybe he just accepted it and moved on."

Rodney emphatically shook his head. "No…there was something in the way he looked at me. It was almost sympathetic, and a little guilty. Like…"

"In his reality he and Jennifer are together," Sheppard finished for him.

Rodney nodded and slid his empty glass across the table. Sheppard finished off his own drink before refilling Rodney's glass and then doing the same to his own.

Rodney took a sip of his drink before sliding the tablet he'd been working on towards Sheppard. "I've created an inter-dimensional portal, kind of like the quantum mirror thing, but more simplistic. No matter transmission, but radio waves can get through." He leaned back in his chair again and motioned to the tablet. "I've spent the last day opening it to different realities and accessing Atlantis' computer remotely. It's relatively easy. Most of the codes are the same or only slightly varied from ours." He saw Sheppard's eyes light up and held up a warning finger. "Don't get too excited. The portal only stays open for five seconds, sometimes six, and once I try a certain dimensional frequency I can't go back there. It's a one shot thing."

Sheppard scrolled through the information displayed on the tablet and frowned.

"Not very interesting so far," Rodney said when he saw disappointment in his friend's eyes. "But I'll keep looking."

Sheppard nodded and pushed the tablet back towards Rodney. "What does this have to do with what we were talking about?"

Rodney frowned and shifted in his seat like a kid in the hot seat in the principal's office. "Useful information isn't the only thing I looked for in some of those realities."

Sheppard frowned in confusion. "Meaning?"

Rodney shrugged, and as he raised his glass to his lips he said, "Personnel records."

Sheppard snorted, though even he didn't know if it was out of amusement or anger.

Neither did Rodney, but he didn't care either way. "Out of fifty realities, we're both on Atlantis at the same time in forty-one. Out of those forty-one, Ronon is also on Atlantis for all of them." Rodney took a particularly large gulp of his drink. "They're listed as married in three."

"What about you and Keller?" asked John, and he instantly regretted it when Rodney blanched.

"Eighteen," he replied, his voice hollow. "You'd almost think that would make me feel a little bit better, but it doesn't. It makes it worse." He looked at John and sighed. "There are at least eighteen Rodney McKays out there married to her, and I…"

John didn't need to be a psychic to see where the sentence was heading. "You wish you were one of them."

Rodney nodded but said, "But I'm not. And I won't be." He stood up, polished off the rest of his drink and carefully placed the glass on the table. He looked at Sheppard and gave his friend a sincere smile. "Thanks for letting me get that off my chest, and the drink."

Sheppard stood as well and extended his hand towards Rodney. Rodney shook his hand and slapped his shoulder before turning and walking towards the door.

Sheppard was about to call out to him but Rodney stopped and turned around before he had the chance.

"I've got the computer set up to automatically dial random realties and retrieve tactical information," Rodney said with a smirk that widened when he saw Sheppard's sheepish nod. "Good night, John."

He heard Sheppard say the same to him as he walked through the door and into the corridor. He thought about heading to the makeshift cafeteria for something to eat, but decided an extra few minutes sleep would be better for him. He turned and headed towards the residential area. The transporters had been disabled during the last Replicator attack so he had to take the long way round, which for some reason didn't bother him tonight.

He was just about to go through the door to the residential deck when he heard a small whimper coming from underneath the next flight of stairs. He waited for second and then heard it again. He moved quietly onto the next downward flight of stairs and peered down onto the landing for the next level. There, sitting with his back to the wall was Johnny Dex. The five year old son of Jennifer and Ronon was in a pair of blue pajamas, his light hair mussed about as if he'd been asleep at some point during the night and his face wet from tears.

Rodney watched the boy for a moment, then made his way down the stairs. The boy looked up as he got closer, but otherwise remained still.

"Hey there," Rodney said quietly as he knelt down in front of the boy. "What are you doing out here by yourself?"

The boy shrugged but didn't say anything.

Inwardly Rodney sighed and cursed at having a conscience that wouldn't let him leave the boy alone. "Come on," he said as he stood up and held his hands out to the little boy. "We should get you home. I bet your parents are worried sick about you."

Little Dex looked at Rodney and then took his hands and stood up.

Rodney could see he was tired, so he picked the boy up and hugged him to him. To his surprise and discomfort, the boy hugged him back. He made sure the boy was secure in his arms and headed up the stairs. He'd just made it into the corridor when he felt the first tiny snore emanate from the child. He approached Ronon and Jennifer's door, his stomach churning like the water at the bottom of Niagara Falls.

He was about to pass his hand over the chime sensor when he heard her voice coming from behind him.

"Oh thank God," said Jennifer as she jogged towards them. "We've been looking everywhere for him." She stopped and immediately began running her hands over her son, searching for injuries and making sure he was okay.

Rodney swallowed the bile in his throat and softly said, "He's fine."

"Where'd you find him?" asked Ronon as he came up from the opposite direction that Jennifer had.

For an instant Rodney faltered and was tempted to tell Ronon off- again- but when Johnny squirmed in his arms Rodney sighed. "Out on the stairs heading to the South Pier." He turned and with as little jostling as he could manage he handed the sleeping toddler to his father.

Ronon hugged his son to him and then looked at Rodney. The big Satedan gave Rodney an appreciative nod and then opened the door to their quarters and headed inside.

Rodney didn't wait and started walking towards his own quarters a couple of corridors over. He'd gotten eight feet when Jennifer called out his name. He stopped, closed his eyes and sighed, then opened his eyes and half turned towards her. He heard more than saw her approach, and a second later she was stepping around so that she could face him.

Before he could stop her she threw her arms around his neck and drew him into a tight hug.

"Thank you," she whispered into his ear.

Rodney fought desperately against the urge to slip his arms around her waist, but in the end his body ached to feel her in his arms again. His arms lifted against his will and went around her for the first time in six years. Rodney closed his eyes and reveled in the experience; the way her body molded perfectly against his, just as he remembered; the feel of her long hair tickling his face and neck, just as it always did when they'd hugged; and her natural scent that was as beautiful as anything science or nature could create. It wasn't until the fingertips of her right hand moved up into his hair that the illusion came apart and he came crashing back into reality. He put his hands on her hips and pushed her away even as he stepped away from her.

He could see that she was as shocked about what she'd done as he was, and he decided to spare them both any further grief by turning and walking away without another word or look.

He moved with sure and confident steps until he turned the corner into the next corridor, then he allowed himself the luxury of placing his hand against the wall to give his legs some support in holding him upright. It took him a minute to steady himself, and when he looked up he realized he'd turned left instead of turning right. He cursed himself for being so affected by something as simple as a hug from a married woman and headed back to the intersection. He glanced back towards Jennifer and Ronon's quarters out of reflex, and ducked back into the corridor when he saw her still standing there.

He stood there, hidden and immobilized by something he couldn't identify as Jennifer lifted her hands to her face and… wiped away tears?

Rodney slid back farther when he heard the door open, staying close enough to the corner to barely be able to see. He watched as Ronon walked up to Jennifer and placed his hand on her shoulder. What happened next excited him, distressed him and confused him all at once: Jennifer moved away as though Ronon's touch had scalded her and breezed past him into heir quarters, leaving Ronon alone in the hall.

Rodney froze as Ronon turned his head and looked directly at him. For an instant everything between the two men played out in that look: friendship, camaraderie, brotherhood; the love of the same woman, competition, victory and defeat: and of course, hatred.

Rodney knew enough to not back down, he hadn't backed down from much since the Replicators made running impossible, so he stepped out into the corridor and faced Ronon directly. After a moment, Ronon turned away and went into his quarters.

Rodney took a deep breath and started to head for his quarters, but stopped and made a decision.

Ten minutes later he was sitting at the main communications station in the control room.

'Are you sure about this, Rodney?'

Rodney looked at the screen and nodded to the commander of the _Sun Tzu_. "Positive, Sam. I need to get out of this city."

Rodney regarded Sam as she tried to discern just what was happening. She'd mentioned multiple times how she'd love to have him running her engine room on the _Sun Tzu_, but he'd always declined. His place had always been here, on Atlantis, because she needed him.

Not so much any more. Kavanaugh and Zelenka did most of the important work these days anyway and Grodin knew almost as much about the gate as he did. Besides, Atlantis herself was in a sorry state due to repeated Replicator attacks. The most work in the fight these days was being done out there, among the stars by Earth's fourteen ships.

'Rodney if this has to do with Jen…'

"If you don't want me, Sam," interrupted Rodney as he crossed his arms across his chest, "just say so."

Sam nodded, though sympathy and a fair amount of understanding graced her face. 'Have you cleared it with Ellis?'

"He'll understand," replied Rodney, having no doubt that the General and commander of Atlantis would acquiesce to his request for transfer.

Sam spoke to someone off to her right and then turned back to him. 'We'll be there in six hours. That enough time?'

Rodney gave Sam a sad smile and said, "Ten minutes would be enough time."

'Understood,' she replied with a sad smile of her own. 'See you soon. _Sun Tzu_ out.'

Rodney closed the channel and stood up, then steeled himself for a chat with his CO.

* * *

Five hours later Rodney sat in his quarters waiting for the _Sun Tzu_ to arrive. Ellis had indeed been understanding of his need to leave the city, and he couldn't argue Sam needing the help aboard the _Sun Tzu_. The General had even agreed not to tell anyone until after he was gone.

Abe had always been a good friend.

"I can't believe you're running away like this, McKay!" Sheppard nearly shouted from his chair by the cleared off desk.

"Believe it," replied Rodney as he sat down on the- not his anymore- bed. "It's best for everyone concerned."

"Especially you," Sheppard added bitterly.

Rodney ignored the tone of his friend's voice and responded to the words. "Yes, for me."

Sheppard looked at Rodney and sighed. "I can't really blame you, I guess. I'm almost surprised you managed to hold out for six years. I probably wouldn't have." John fidgeted in his chair for a second. "Are you sure you don't want to say good-by to …"

"I'm sure," replied Rodney as he tossed his tablet onto the pile of boxes on the floor.

John nodded and glanced down to his watch. "What time does the _Sun Tzu_ arrive?"

Rodney glanced at his own watch. "Should be here in an hour or so."

'Control Room to Dr. McKay.'

Rodney tapped his earpiece. "Go ahead."

'The _Sun Tzu_ is approaching planet fall, Doctor,' replied Sgt. Harriman. 'ETA ten minutes.'

"Understood," Rodney acknowledged as he stood up, grateful to Sam for cutting some time off her ETA. "And thanks, Walter…for everything."

'My pleasure, Dr, McKay. And good luck.'

Rodney looked at John. "Ten minutes."

John nodded and then stood up as well. "Well, you know, it's not good-bye right?" he said as he looked around the bare room. "You'll be around and visiting, supply runs and whatever."

"Sure," said Rodney before holding out his hand.

John sighed and shook his friend's hand. "I wish…"

"I do too," said Rodney sincerely. "Listen I haven't said good-bye to Teyla or Zelenka. I've left them messages but I'd appreciate it if you'd tell them…"

The door chime sounded as the two men separated and Rodney frowned as John gave him a curious look.

As John was on his way out anyway, he moved to the door and passed his hand over the locking mechanism, and then got the shock of his life when he found Jennifer Dex standing in the doorway, her hands clasped together in front of her, eyes moist and as extreme a look of lostness about her that he'd ever seen on anyone. He glanced at Rodney and saw his friend go rigid with God knew what. Fear. Anger. Love.

John let Jennifer in and then left, giving Rodney a small wave as he did to wish his friend good luck.

Rodney couldn't return Sheppard's wave. He was too transfixed on Jennifer and the way she looked about his room, as though she were truly coming to believe something that she'd thought was impossible.

"The CMO of the _Sun Tzu_ called a few minutes ago," she explained, her voice soft and cracking and her eyes settled on the small pile of boxes on the floor, "to request the transfer of your medical files." Her eyes slowly moved up to find his, the movement causing pooled up tears to escape her eyes and fall out onto her cheeks. "You're leaving?"

Rodney swallowed the lump in his throat and managed a nod. This was exactly what he'd hoped to avoid.

"Atlantis needs you, Rodney!" she all but yelled. "You can't leave!"

"I have to," he replied calmly. "It's best for ever…

'_Sun Tzu_ to McKay.'

Rodney held Jennifer's gaze and activated his comm. "Go ahead, Sam."

'We're within transport range,' Sam replied. 'Whenever you're ready.'

Rodney paused when Jennifer took a hesitant step towards him but then said, "Standby."

Rodney tried to tear his eyes from Jennifer's but he couldn't. How many nights had he woken up in a cold sweat after dreaming about those eyes, those lips and that woman? Too many.

"I can't stay anymore, Jennifer," he said softly and calling her by her first name in nearly six years. The way she gasped and the way her eyes widened told him she noticed. "I can't." His insides were shaking and his throat was drier than the driest desert. "I love you, Jennifer," he whispered across the room, and if her eyes had been wide the first time he'd used her name, then they were saucer sized now. "I still do and it hurts to see you with Ronon. I thought it would get easier over time, but it hasn't. It's gotten worse and I can't take it anymore." Rodney turned around and started to reach down for his duffle bag.

"I lov…"

He stopped and whirled around to face her, his eyes hard and his nostrils flaring in anger as he thrust an accusing finger towards her. "Don't!" he admonished angrily, causing Jennifer to jump in her place. "Don't you dare say it." Rodney lowered his hand and tried to calm himself down a little. "Just don't. You have a family, Jennifer. Make that work."

He turned around and picked up his bag, slinging it over his shoulder as he took a deep breath. His hand was almost at his comm. when her voice, soft and delicate reached his ears.

"You're doing this for me aren't you?"

His hand froze and he closed his eyes.

"After all the pain I've caused you," she said softly, the words coming out of her mouth slowly as though she were still thinking it through, "you're leaving to make it easier for me. Aren't you?"

Rodney opened his eyes and turned to see tears streaming down Jennifer's face like tiny little rivers that had broken through the dams that had once held back enormous reservoirs of water. "You need to go home, Jennifer, and make it work for Johnny's sake, for Ronon's sake, for your sake and for mine." At her confused look he sighed. "Don't let the pain I've suffered be in vain. Don't make me have gone through losing you for nothing. It will make it bearable only if you're happy."

He nearly bolted to her when her knees buckled and she staggered towards the chair Sheppard had been sitting in. She landed in it without hurting herself it seemed so he kept his station and hoped his words had made an impact.

As her teary eyes found his again he reached up and activated his comm. "McKay to _Sun Tzu_. Ready for transport."

In the two point eight seconds it took for the transport to begin he heard her say, "I'll always love you."

The next instant he was aboard the _Sun Tzu_, surrounded by the things from his quarters. And Sam.

She smiled initially but it turned to a worried frown in short order. She rushed to him and put a hand on his shoulder. "Are you okay, Rodney?"

It wasn't until he looked into her eyes that he noticed the wetness in his own. "No," he said with a shudder. Sam enveloped him in a warm and supportive embrace. "No I'm not."

End.


End file.
